Is it Hard? Are You Crazy?

When people ask about this new diet we're doing, and hear us talk about it, they usually look at us with wide eyes full of disbelief. "Isn't that hard?" they ask.

Of course it is.

But you know what's harder? Watching James lose more and more weight. Wondering if I should ask him to watch Shelby while I run errands, because he's been having a bad day and might have to spend the whole time in the bathroom, or in pain because he's trying not to spend the whole time in the bathroom. Watching him run to the bathroom after eating, and knowing there's no possible way he's absorbing the nutrients in the food because it's just passing through too fast. Watching him hold his side and try to pretend the pain's not that bad.

Want to know what's even harder than all of that? Spending 12 to 14 hours each day for a week at the hospital, visiting him and advocating for him and talking to doctors and nurses, with a 5 month old baby. Then repeating that scenario four times in five months. I would very much like to never, ever, ever go through that again.

So yes, the Specific Carbohydrate Diet is hard, but it's not that hard when someone's health is on the line. With no diagnosis, there are few treatment options for James. He's basically been told to continue taking the seven prescriptions that keep him out of the hospital (barely) and give him side effects that are almost as bad as the disease itself. If this diet even makes him a little bit better, it will all be worth it.

James has gone from having multiple daily attacks to mostly stress-induced attacks. He's able to eat food without having to run to the bathroom afterwards. He's not gaining weight yet, mostly because "early satiety" (feeling full after just a couple of bites) and forgetting to eat are still issues for him, but what he does eat stays in.

He's been a busy guy the past few weeks. We're starting a small business (hello stress). He's been helping friends get their business up and running (more stress). He's been gone a lot, sometimes five days at a time, because he can't drive with the medication he's taking and I can't pick him up and drop him off when the baby's asleep in bed.

Through all of this, he's been sticking to the diet. I am so proud of him.

I stay up late at night a few nights a week, after Shelby's gone to bed, to prepare and freeze foods that he can eat. I've peeled and de-seeded tomatoes to make spaghetti-style sauce and ketchup. I've peeled and de-seeded zucchini and summer squash. I've perfected the baked-sausage-log-cut-into-patties. (Maybe that needs a name?) I do my best to keep at least a couple different kinds of SCD-legal food ready to be heated, and I keep bananas and applesauce on hand, so if he is ever hungry, there is SOMETHING he can eat.

It is hard, it is tiring, but I don't think he would be able to stick to the diet without it. Not right now, when he's away from home so much. Watching him improve, little by little, makes it worth every lost minute of sleep. (And hearing that the homemade ketchup is The Best Ketchup Ever isn't too bad, either.) Dropping off food and getting a text a little later saying I'm a lifesaver is nice. Hearing that someone smelled his soup or sausage, asked for a bite, and Bogarted his food is annoying, but awesome at the same time. That means that I'm making food that isn't just tasty for me and James. Non-SCD folks actually WANT to eat it.

Want to know a secret? My intention when starting this was to do the diet right along with James. But with him away so much, I've been cheating. A lot. I make all this uber-healthy food for James, and I make sure Shelby eats healthy, and then I order pizza or go through a drive thru for myself because I can't find the time to make something I want to eat, or I'm too tired, or I've waited too long and need to eat now now now. This needs to stop. I can make it work when he's home, I need to make it work when he's away. Because my health is important, too.

My plan is to start making SCD-legal dinners every. single. night. I'll make extra to freeze. If it works the way I think it will, it'll cut down on the amount of time I spend on my midnight cooking adventures. (That time will then be devoted to midnight small business administration adventures, not sleeping.) Shelby's been getting better and better at playing independently for longer periods of time, which means that I can actually spend the time making dinner as long as I don't let the kitchen become a federal disaster area. I think it might work.

I also want to start juicing every day again. And convince James to drink fresh juices, too. If juices work for him, it'll be like drinking vitamins. Very bio-available vitamins. For a while, I was making a juice every morning that consisted of spinach, kale, cucumber, zucchini, apple, lemon, and ginger. It really made a difference in my energy level and my mood. Of course, this hinges on whether or not I can keep the kitchen clean enough to have it not be a hassle to use the juicer, and wash the juicer, every day. So we'll see.